bumpsarebad | Week 17-18 Post Chemo: Cancer DOES NOT make you Exempt

Listen here folks, having cancer or being a cancer survivor does not make you exempt from all other frustrations and heartache in the world. You do not get to collect $200 and pass go. You do not get a free pass.

You would think, “Hey, this person has been dealing with enough…the universe will give them a break!” Well, guess again, the world keeps turning and cancer patients and survivors alike, still have to deal with the natural order of life. We will have successes and happiness, yet in the same moment we can still deal with struggles and sadness.

In the past few weeks, I have learned just that. I am not special, in the sense that no horrible things will happen to me again, or make me feel bad, or cause havoc in my life. Hear me now…this will happen! Personally, I did not think my life would have to deal with such pain and frustration so soon, however maybe this is a learning lesson. Maybe this is the beginning of something really great. I am learning that only in those moments, where you are so weak or beat down, are the moments when you can make the biggest transformations. It is in those moments when you are raw to the bone, exposed, and vulnerable that you can allow for change to occur. If for not being so transparent, your ego would not allow you to recognize and accept that opportunity to make a change.

On a day to day basis, we live our lives as we think they are supposed to be lived. Most of us are just on autopilot, doing the same things we do each day, getting the list checked off, and making it to the next day. Are we taking the time to look inward? Do we even really know how to do that? What does that really even mean?

I believe that when something catastrophic happens to us…whether it be cancer, or a breakup, or death, or layoffs, or the million other things that happen in life that just break us down…these are the moments where we have an opportunity to make a decision. There is a fork in the road, and we can decide the direction we want to take. The first path, as well as the easiest, is to decide to give in to the sadness and letdown that life has handed to us. We can fall into depressed, or become angry, or dwell in our own pity party. We can allow that inner voice, in all of us, to tell us that we are not good enough for good fortune, triumph, or joy.

Or…we can decide to take the path least chosen. This path is the path that, instead of reacting so quickly, stops for a moment and takes a look around us. Amongst all the haze of ugliness, deceit, and confusion that life distracts us with, this choice allows us to see beyond and into the clear. Beyond the haze, lies so much positivity and goodness that we often tend to forget…especially during these challenging moments…yet provides us with so much more clarity. In this clearness, we remember to be grateful for the goodness that is still in our lives. We may lose some things that are dear to us, but we will gain in other areas often unexpected. We are open to altering our day to day to better ourselves, even if it means taking a risk. Rather than thinking the world is against us, we remember that we cannot control everything that has happened and will happen in our lives. We bring ourselves up above the things we cannot control and find peace and solace with the greatness that continues to surround our lives.

What we can control is how we prepare ourselves to deal with the inevitable fluctuations of life and how we chose to react to these ups and downs…whether big or small. With that said…sadness, being frustrated, or having a bad day is not something bad or unacceptable. We are all entitled to having a crap day, but at the same time we should recognize that we are also entitled to turning things around for the better. Each life situation is unique, and so each emotion and reaction will be slightly or dramatically different. We are all forced to deal with the inevitable challenges and tests and tribulations that life has to offer. It is up to us to determine which path we want to go down. The world has a natural pull of negativity and positivity. If we send out negativity into the world the world will gladly send it right back to us, however if we send out positivity into the world, the world will respond back accordingly.

Here are pictures from week 17